A Blessing of Light
In Hebrew, his name means “flash of lightning.”
But in his father’s language, which happened to be Swahili, his name means “blessing from God.”
To me, he is both.
He is Barack Obama.
And he is only presidential candidate who has willingly and openly supported The Americans with Disabilities Restoration Act.
To most people, that doesn’t mean a damn thing.
But to me, and to my family, a presidential candidate who supports the rights of Americans with disabilities is a beacon of hope on a long journey through an endless night of prejudice and discrimination, a darkness filled with shallow insults and unnecessary limits.
Because I’ve lost 60% of my hearing. So far.
To me, Barack is a “blessing of light.”
And when you have to wait 214 years for a free country founded on the premise that all men are created equal to grant you the right of reasonable accommodation…you will know why Barack Obama is a blessing of light.
When the only option your white grandfather has after 66 years is to donate his remains to medical research because discrimination never afforded him a decent burial…you will know why Barack Obama is a blessing of light.
When the only jobs your intelligent, hard-of-hearing mother can find after your father leaves are pumping gas and washing dishes…you will know why Barack Obama is a blessing of light.
And when your mother is falsely accused of stealing and loses her job because her boss is a thief and a cheat who blames the deaf woman because she has no protections under the law…you will know why Barack Obama is a blessing of light.
When your friend invites you to a Christmas service and you can only understand ten words out of the whole sermon because the church doesn’t have assistive listening devices for the hard-of-hearing or sign language interpreters for the deaf, but you think you heard the pastor say something about “eternal salvation”…you will know why Barack Obama is a blessing of light.
When your first name is “That”, your middle name is “Deaf”, and your last name is “Guy”…you will know why Barack Obama is a blessing of light.
When you go to a five-star restaurant and the waiter spends more time staring at your hearing aids than he does telling you about the daily specials…you will know why Barack Obama is a blessing of light.
When you hard work all week and fill up your car at $3.75 a gallon and the clerk behind the counter calls you “Channel 5″…you will know why Barack Obama is a blessing of light.
When you have to get a new vibrating alarm clock that costs $75…you will know why Barack Obama is a blessing of light.
When you pay $300 for two visual alert smoke detectors and you know hearing people can get two smoke detectors for $20 at Wal-Mart…you will know why Barack Obama is a blessing of light.
When your $5,000 hearing aids are “on sale” for $4,200…you will know why Barack Obama is a blessing of light.
When The United States Supreme Court rules that it is legal for a school not to provide a sign langauge interpreter for your deaf child because she only understands 57% of what the teacher says with hearing aids…you will know why Barack Obama is a blessing of light.
When your IQ is 148 but people think your stupid because you can’t hear as well as they can…you will know why Barack Obama is a blessing of light.
When your grade point average is 3.75 on a 4.0 scale in graduate school and your college professor tells you that writers need to be able to hear in order to be able to write…you will know why Barack Obama is a blessing of light.
When you sit in the office of an ear, nose, and throat doctor to find out why your hearing loss is getting progressively worse but he tells you not to have children because he thinks you are genetically inferior…and your daughter died seven months ago…you will know why Barack Obama is a blessing of light.
And when you say all of these things because you’ve finally had enough and people still think you’re talking about a political issue instead of a personal matter that affects you every single day…you will know why I do not have the patience for meaningless political rhetoric.
Will he win the presidency? I certainly hope so. Because he is the only candidate who has promised to make an effort on behalf of people with disabilities.
People like me.
And I. Have had. Enough.
But for those of you wondering…I do not want the federal government to hold my hand when I cross the street. I just want a crosswalk painted on the road and a sign that reminds driver to yield to pedestrains so I can cross the street safely and without fear of losing my livelihood.
Because I know that jaywalking isn’t just illegal–it is dangerous.
And I simply want the right to cross the street safely, without fear of repurcussions, so that I can keep my dignity as a human being and stand on my own two feet as a man. And if the federal government paints the crosswalk and puts up the sign then it saves all of us a whole lot of money and lawsuits and hassles in the long run.
Nobody needs to build a bridge over dry land.
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Wow Nor….thank you for this. And thank you for being so transparent…it is very refreshing…
Hope your having a super weekend, and uh, I tagged you…come on over and get the scoop! Sorry, had to…
Happy day!
You are right…this one is controversial.
I can read your perspective and respect your experiences in life: the injustice of this world toward the “physically impaired”. You have endured much…this is a personal issue with you and we are not to read a political agenda in your words…
I’m trying to think it all through…give me time.
GodsGal:
Glad you found it refreshing; the honesty and the transparency of just how personal this is and how it affects me every single day, is how I tried to avoid sounding like I had some sort of “political agenda.”
As for the “tag”…I’m on my way over.
Michelle:
Take your time. It was very difficult to explain accurately, and I’m still not sure I did that. I think that in the midst of politics–left or right–people forget the personal. And that’s actually very frustrating.
Thank you so much for taking the risk in sharing things that most people would be afraid to do so. You are brave and I admire your candidacy greatly.
I support Obama. Not being able to vote due to being an immigrant is another story but in my spirit, I support him. God has shown me his humble spirit and I believe this country needs someone who is humble. I don’t know if things will change if and when he does get elected but I am believing in faith that this will be a breakthrough election for America and that God will do a new thing through the new president.
I think your reasons for supporting him are very valid. Many individuals vote for particular candidates based on personal experiences that were very much so determined by the operating government at the time and that is very understandable. I encourage you to pray for God’s revelation regarding the appropriate person to carry His will for this country and its impact on other countries around the world. Sometimes we have to hand our personal afflictions to the Lord and allow Him to dictate our decisions, especially major ones like these. God knows your pain and He knows what you and other individuals that go through similar trauma, need and He is faithful to supply all our needs according to His riches in Heaven, Amen!
Praying for your strength and understanding during this time of election and praying for God’s will to be done throughout the process.
Have a blessed day
Thank you so much for your comment–and your support–gchyayles. It was…difficult…for me to write that Essay, and there still so many things I have left out…
…most people know the story of my friend, Britany, which I discussed in “A Dark & Stormy Night,” but I never said how difficult it was for her–like it was for me–to grow up with a hearing loss. Her parents never believed her. And at her memorial service, which was held at her church, I sat in the front row and I couldn’t understand a thing. It was a grand cathedral with atrocious acoustics. I can’t imagine how hard it was for her to attend that church because her hearing loss was worse than mine. I remember once she had told me that she got up in the middle of the service and walked out because she couldn’t hear and it was eating her alive. It took her three days to calm down enough and tell the pastor and his wife, whom she was living with at the time.
And I remember her telling me that that pastor wanted her to go to his church, and she felt obligated to do so because he and his wife had been so nice to her. And they were very nice to her. But Britany felt more at home at a Deaf church, which was right up the street from where she lived when she finally got a place of her own. She didn’t have any barriers at a Deaf church. She felt comfortable and didn’t struggle with understanding the sermons like she did at a hearing church. And she wanted to get more involved in The Deaf Community, but her hearing pastor had said, “The Deaf Community is around all the time. I just want you to go to my church.” I think of those words now, and I realize that he did not understand the importance of community. And, eventually, Britany went back to his church. She told me stories about being the only one who was in the nursery watching the kids during the service. And I thought, “Is THAT why her pastor wants her to go to his church?!?!”
Do not misunderstand. I am not blaming her pastor for what happened to Britany. God knows there is plenty of blame to go around and I’ve certainly got to shoulder my share of it. But…it is another example of the misconceptions that Deaf and hard-of-hearing people have to endure.
NorEaster…I love your heart. I really do. God really has planted you deep inside of my heart. The more of your heart I hear through your words, the more I love you. My HEART has heard more through you over the past couple of weeks than my ears have heard in the thousands of sermons that I have “listened” to. I’m so thankful that you hear with your heart, and are teaching all of us to do the same. Thank you for sharing this. Your honesty enCOURAGEs me. You have helped me find courage again NorEaster. Courage to be who I am, to speak who I am, and to take the time to listen on the inside to continue to find out who I am. You are a blessing. Thank you for giving…I am a life that was changed.
Thank you, Kelly. Thank you.
I am sending you happy smiles that laugh out loud on the inside of you today!!
[...] In Hebrew, his name means “flash of lightning.” But in his father’s language, which happened to be Swahili, his name means “blessing from God.” To me, he is both. He is Barack Obama. And he is only presidential candidate who has willingly and openly supported The Americans with Disabilities Restoration Act. To most people, that doesn’t mean a damn thing. But to me, and to my family, a presidential candidate who supports the rights of Americans with disabilities is a beacon of hope on a long journey through an endless night of prejudice and discrimination, a darkness filled with shallow insults and unnecessary limits. Because I’ve lost 60% of my hearing. So far. To me, Barack is a “blessing of light.” And when you have to wait 214 years for a free country founded on the premise that all men are created equal to grant you the right of reasonable accommodation so you can get a job and keep it […] [...]
I’ve been thinking this through and have a better understanding, I believe, of what you are saying.
I’ve not walked in your moccasins but know I’m asked to try: Don’t judge any man until you have walked two moons in his moccasins. ~Indian proverb
I’ve barely begun the walk down disability lane, but what little I’ve seen, it’s not a smooth path. I am beginning to feel your pain and understand your anger.
♥ U
Maybe you’re walking in my moccasins because God wants you to have a better understanding of just how hard it is to endure 100,000 pounds of pressure per square inch on my feet for every mile I walk.
Well, actually. That’s true of us all.
But you get idea.
♥ U2
Dear Obama…
The Global Poverty Act.
Thank You.
[and I'm happy in my flip-flops...I'll save the NE's moccasins for another day]
Thanks for stopping by, Cathi.
And, uh, you’ll have to talk to Michelle about my moccasins. They’re kind of on loan to her.
I think.
I totally understand…but we can let michelle know that I prefer sandals or slippers. So, start working on that now, ok?
lol yall crack me–SO cute!
LOVE EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU
(this comment is for both posts)
I’ll have to let my husband know that he has a spiritual gift. Seriously though, it is interesting to be married to a man who has a handicap. In his case, because it is his sight… he doesn’t pick up on body language (which can start some good fights). But there are so many ways this world is not set up for him. People think he is rude at times because he doesn’t wave back in a restaurant or passing in church. If they don’t speak and get close enough, he may see a shadow pass by, but has no way of knowing who it is or that they just waved at him.
He lost his sight as a young child, and therefore cannot explain (like you can… and like his father can) what it is like to lose something. It is just his reality. He sees with only his peripheral vision, and has no central vision at all. Only blackness in the middle.
If he had listened to people, he would not be a successful computer programmer. He wouldn’t have ever hunted, or driven an ATV. We don’t know if our children will be affected. His father is blind… and so is he. People told us not to have children just in case they would be blind. He cannot drive, glasses will not help his condition or even improve it slightly, and he uses special magnifiers to help him read. Sunny days are blinding… dusk may as well be midnight.
It was difficult for him to get a job after college. It was several years before someone took a chance on him. (who wants a legally blind computer programmer?)
He is extremely smart, and has so many great qualities. People tend to be uncomfortable because he doesn’t look them right in the eye. If he looks straight at them, they are invisible to him. He has to look from the side of his eye. He takes forever shopping, since he has to pick things up and look at them.
I sure do love him.
But he has very few friends… people just don’t bother to go out of their way to pick him up to go places. They don’t bother to sit and talk with him and find out how great he is. He can’t meet them for coffee… or for anything unless they offer to drive, or I take him.
Curbs aren’t painted so that he can see them. Steps aren’t marked. Crosswalks, well… he can’t see the other side for the signal… nor can he see the cars coming from any distance. Nope… the world isn’t set up for disabled people. My father had a stroke… since then there are many places he cannot go and things he cannot do.
Heidi:
I think your husband and I should get together and have some milkshakes. I don’t mind driving. Not at all.
When I was in college, the university that I attended got a substantial grant to improve the admissions building. I was one of five students with disabilities who participated in a forum to make sure that the new building had the “reasonable accomodations” mandated by law through The Americans with Disabilities Act, which the first President Bush signed into law in July of 1990. Well, the five us gave our suggestions. For me it was pretty simple: Visual alert smoke detectors, lights at the counter for when it was time for the next person to move up, amplified phones, &c.
Someone else suggested that the counter be lower to accommodate wheelchairs. But there was also a woman who was legally blind who needed just a few simple, reasonable, and polite accommodations–the clerks behind the counter would point at a sheet of paper and say, “You need to sign here.” Well, she couldn’t see where she was supposed to sign. As I dependent on sight, she depended on sound and scent. When the meeting was over, this woman–can’t remember her name–held out her hand as we said goodbye. I took that to mean that she wanted to shake my hand. So I slowly reached out, and, as she felt my hand in hers, we shook hands.
I only met her that one time. Years ago. Whatever it was. (Because my hearing got significantly worse when I was an undergrad, it took me longer to finish.) But I never forgot her. She was so graceful under pressure.
I do hope that one day, if he hasn’t already, your husband will realize that he has, in fact, been given an extraordinairy gift. Since, like you said, he doesn’t know what it was like to have something and then lose it, it just might be easier for him to accept his gift.
And I just mentioned in Michelle’s latest post that I have seen God’s strength in my hearing loss; the world may see it as a disabliity, an other, but to me it is a tremendous gift.
And NEWSFLASH…It IS a gift. There is NO WAY I would be who I am today without my hearing loss. It has shaped me, molded me, taught me compassion, how to LISTEN. And patience. I have extraordinairy patience with people who are disabled.
By the way, for more infomation about what my hearing loss means to me, see
A Mighty Stream.
And let me know if your husband wants that milkshake!
He thought going for milkshakes sounds great.
He is so much more gracious with people than I am. When he asks the total in a store, and they just point to the screen and look at him like he is an idiot I get angry. But it happens all of the time. Sometimes when he needs to, he’ll nicely point out he has a visual problem, and could they please show him where to sign (etc.). Generally I pay the check, or point for him, or tell him the amounts as quietly as possible so that he doesn’t need to worry about it.
The worst ‘date’ we’ve had was the movie “Shindler’s List” It was all subtitled, and I had to read it all for him. We didn’t know it would be. The people behind us were getting so annoyed, even though I was whispering as softly as I could.
I don’t know if he looks at it as a gift… but I don’t think he feels ‘handicapped’. It just is what it is.
Hey NorEaster,
It is refreshing to see someone choose a candidate based on what the candidate stands for and not on which one the dislike / fear the least.
2 things:
And this has poem written all over it. “The Blessing of Light”…with a repeating refrain. just sayin’
And thanks for sharing your pain and struggles.
Ric:
Wait ’til I put it in a podcast. I’m doing the podcasts in chronological order–last to latest–so it will be a while, but this one is really going to be something, I think. Obviously, I’m hoping to have it done by November.
Heidi:
On the other side, Britany and I went to go see The Passion of The Christ in the movie theater. It was the last movie we saw. That was subtitled. So it was GREAT for us to see because there were no limits for either one of us–we are both Hard-of-hearing.
Well…I still am. But, if I had to guess, I’d say she’s hearing things no human being has ever heard before.
mmmm… that’s a really great thought.
Yeah.
Yeah it is, isn’t it?